September!
What up, big dog.
I hope you’re sitting down for this one. Not that there’s anything shocking to tell you, but I just hope you’re comfortable. Pour yourself a nice cup of tea and put your feet up. Relax, you deserve a break. Imagine this newsletter being narrated to you by Morgan Freeman.
Thanks for being cool during the back to school madness, and I hope you didn’t get a ticket for going 50 in a school zone on the first day back if you don’t have school aged kids. It makes me genuinely happy down in the cockles of my heart that you’ll wait a couple weeks to come to me instead of settling for someone else. And if you have a 1st or 3rd favourite barber, I’m okay with that.
Heads up next up is Thanksgiving, Oct 11; there’s always a rush before holidays where people have to see their mothers’ judging eyes, and also fall is family picture time, so expect a bit of a rush and book early.
Again, free parking in back along the wall, Book Now if you have better things to do than read this, and be prepared to be bumped 15 mins ahead or behind to help others clamouring for the Seth’s Experience. Jk that’s not a thing. But imagine?
Big News?
I had a kindergartener tell me recently that my barbershop was boring because I didn’t have any snacks or treats. It really got me thinking and wondering how I can make the shop better, more fun. So I’m happy and excited to announce that starting today, Seth’s Barbershop will offer nothing new! I’ve got tap water and mints. THIS AIN’T A 7-11 KID. Just kidding, he’s a nice kid.
He said it’s a boring place but he doesn’t know the good stories. Like the one time Metallica’s tour bus pulled up out front and they all came in wanting haircuts. They tried playing the rockstar card but I informed them I had a full schedule and I don’t bump my regulars for anybody. That’s how much I love you. Besides, they would only come back every few years when they’re on tour. I guess a 5 year old doesn’t know who Metallica is anyway, so that wouldn’t be a great story for him. I should’ve told him Bluey came in for a cut, but she would go to a dog groomer, so.
Or the fact that the shop was actually in a different place until a tornado picked it up and spun it around in the air, dropped it on the top of a rainbow where we slid for what seemed like forever, bursting through cotton candy clouds, munching on sugar lightning bolts and petting unicorns before being plopped down where we are now. I didn’t tell him that, thinking he’d be less wowed and more sad at having missed it. I would be, too. It was awesome.
Seth’s Fashion Observations
This is nothing new. You may have noticed as I have, that what’s in fashion these days was laughed at and “OMG could you imagine”d not even that long ago. Dad sneakers with tube socks pulled up high. We would never! Fanny packs? Absolutely not! Socks and sandals? Yuck. Ptooey.
Moustaches and mullets came back ironically but now they’re everyday occurrences (I’m a big fan of both). I remember that the cringiest thing one could do was to put on a ball cap THEN do their hair. But that’s where we are now. Along with touques made to look like a longshoreman caught in a gale.
I recently saw an older fellow with long, flowing white hair wearing a teamless football jersey tucked into his faded stonewashed jeans. Tucked in. His jeans. No belt. He wore ratty old Asics, and a ball cap with a hard, tubular curve. I should’ve taken a picture because I give it 5 years and all the kids will be copying him.
Now let me be clear. I’m not judging people on what they wear (aside from doing your hair after putting your hat on. I’ll never be fine with that). What I’m most upset about is that I never had the aloofness and carefree attitude to dress however I wanted. I maxed my emotional labour load worrying about how I’d be perceived. Now that I’m pushing 50 I finally do, and I say as long as you’re comfortable and doing what you want, go for it*.
*Not fully, I mean you still want to look okay, but if you walk around like Adam Sandler or the pigeon lady from Home Alone 2, people wouldn’t say “wow that guy is cool, he doesn't care what people think”, they’d hold their purses close and cross to the other side of the street, and if they knew you they’d sit you down and look you dead in the eye and ask if everything is alright. There’s a fine line between fashionably comfortable and giving up. It’s a double edged sword. Am I using that idiom correctly? Am I using the word ‘idiom’ correctly? Anyway, it’s a Catch 22. Or something, I don’t know. I haven’t read the book.
Seth’s Opinions
Don’t forget: Halloween decorations are not allowed to be put up until Oct 1, No exceptions. I don’t care if it’s a Thursday, do it after work in the dark. Makes it even spookier. And that means Xmas decorations are no earlier than Dec 1. Please respect my humbugginess. Just because they sell it doesn’t mean it’s a green light from all of us. You’re rushing fall!
Not much hair related here this month, or even important. Or interesting, for that matter. I know what you’re thinking, Newsletter Season 1 was great, Season 2 was working out the kinks, and Season 3 seems a little forced. Maybe I need new writers. Or a new character! I'm working on something fun, so stay tuned.
Whatever,
Your Second Favourite Barber,
Seth
PS I love you, you’re handsome/pretty/whatever you want to be. Keep on keepin’ on. Life’s a garden. Dig it.
LINKS!
It feels like it less and less, but there’s Good News out there.
Music has charms to soothe the savage beast.
And very important:
You can still get a mail-in ballot for the referendum, this could allow you more time to study the questions on the implications of your vote. And avoid lineups! And “those people”! But please plan to vote. It’s incredibly important. To use a cliche US saying they use every 4 years, this one is the most important one yet.