This is the October newsletter

Happy October, Theydies and Gentlethem. 

I hope you had a great Thanksgiving and had pie, or at least a Pumpkin Spiced Latte. 

I hope you had a good Hanksgiving and watched Forrest Gump.

I hope you had a spicy Franksgiving and ate some hot wings.

I hope you had a fun Spanksgiving and- oh, let’s just get on with it.

Preface

I’ve been doing some soul searching and I realize I may have come across as cranky in the past couple letters. Like the rules of holiday decorating. I usually get down about fall because I downright abhor winter. But I’m softening in my years, I’m actually kinda digging fall. Must be because I have so many jackets.

1st up: The usual housekeeping. Free parking in back beside the blue Civic, Book Here Now if you’re already not loving where this newsletter is going, and be warned that I may bump you 15 minutes forward or back so I can get more cuts in. There will soon come a time when I skip the housekeeping and let people figure it out on their own. Someday. But not today.

Item B:

I need to clear something up. Last month’s story about Metallica was not true. It’s best to come to Seth’s Barbershop and/or read these newsletters with a sodium deficiency because you should take everything I say with a grain of salt. Salt adds flavour, brings it all together. 

You know it’s false because I 100% would’ve kicked any of you out of the chair to cut Metallica’s hair. A) they were my first concert when I was 12, and B) that picture would go well on my Wall of Fame (currently empty but you’re all stars in my heart).

Now, the story of the time I cut Elvis Presley’s hair, that one is true. OR IS IT?!?

Point the Third:

Since we got screwed out of a summer holiday thanks to a mix of Mother Nature, arsonists, and the lumber industry’s war on broadleaf trees, my family is taking a Mazatlanian holiday in late November, so I’ll be off from Nov 20-30th. (I’m going for a week but need a few days after for the jet lag) 

((I know there’s no jet lag crossing one time zone, I was being facetious. Grain of salt, remember?)) 

(((I just didn’t want to start up again on a Sunday because Alta is closed and it can be a headache opening for me and shooing away their customers, and…you know what? I don’t need to justify my days off to you, you’re not HR! But I just did anyway, blame the lifetime conditioning of being a low-level, hourly employee.)))

Bonus Pro Tip: if you’re looking to book a holiday this winter, do what we did. We shopped all the travel sites for all-inclusive packages and found roughly the same price range, but we finally booked our stay on the hotel website and the flights with WestJet and saved $3000, same rooms and flights as the “package deal” sites. Cut out the middleman and save! Shout out to Spencer G for that great idea.

Client of The Month

Super regular Spencer H (so many Spencers being awesome this month) used to have a red and itchy scalp. I noticed it cleared up so I asked him what he used, and he told me he used Selsun Blue. No fancy elixir, no expensive shampoo, just a $12ish dollar bottle of drug store shampoo. I also get a red and itchy scalp (probably diet related but do you think I’m going to cut out something delicious like gluten or sugar, just to fix what’s wrong with me? Absolutely not). So I went to Shoppers and got some Selsun Blue. Used as instructed for a few weeks, and it’s all but cleared up. (side note, that’s a dumb figure of speech. Is it everything but cleared up? So it’s not cleared up? Either way, it’s all cleared up now). So if you have an itchy scalp, don’t listen to some barber trying to sell you expensive stuff, get the stuff that’s been around forever for a reason. And whatever you do, don’t ask AI. It will lie to you.

Spencer H is also the one who gave me the idea of the crock pot when my towel warmer died. So for that/those reason/s, he is October’s Client of The Month. That, and he brought me goose pepperoni. In return, I will be gifting him one firm handshake and a sincere Thank You.

Seth’s Fashion Observations

You’re looking good. I like that coat.

Seth’s Soapbox

Raise your sons better. I know it’s a hot topic, but it needs repeating. I’m sure you’re raising your boys to not be sexual predators, but we need to raise our sons to be the ones who call the bad ones out. I have 3 sons and we’re doing what we can, and I hope you are, too. I’m not saying you aren’t, but it’s a constant battle. We should be calling out racist and hate speech too, but look where we’re at these days. Don’t be hesitant to tell people it’s not cool to say or do things that are terrible, because if you don’t, you’re picking a side. If you say crappy things in my chair, I won’t be afraid to say something to you, because I only want good people in my chair. (Really wanted to use a bunch of swear words in there but I try to keep it professional) So don’t just raise your kids better, raise them to be world changers, because even doing one important thing can change someone’s world.

And even more importantly, more is caught than taught, so you need to be a good role model and show your boys how to treat women, and people in general, for that matter. Like they say, a good person who is rude to the waiter is not a good person. So be good to everyone.

Lastly, PLEASE VOTE on October 19th! Or earlier! And tell your friends who use the cop-out of “I’m not political” to vote. This is a decision that can’t be reversed in 4 years, it’s the one where I start to plan if I move out of my home province or not.

I love you, you’re handsome/pretty/whatever you want to be. Keep on keepin’ on. Life’s a garden. Dig it.

Your Second Favourite Barber,

Seth

P.S. I know things are expensive these days, but consider being the full-sized chocolate bar house this Halloween. Or “Take Four” little ones if you’re the kind that leaves a note and bowl and operates on the honour system. Whatever you do, DO NOT be the one who hands out cans of pop. They’re too heavy for little arms. Or candy corn. Barf.